Welcome to the first installment of "Things Denise Has Been Pondering".
We're gonna get thoughtful up in here.
Q: How do I show my respect for my husband?
This is something that I feel I could really work on. The biggest challenge for me is that love and respect are not entirely the same thing. I've done all sorts of research on "Ways to Show Your Spouse You Love Them" but somehow those things don't always add up to respect.
I've been thinking a lot about couples who are nearing divorce. I would imagine that would be so scary to feel like you are losing control of your marriage. So, what to do about it? Of the MANY suggestions out there, I think one overlooked tip is to learn to respect your spouse. That's right. It just doesn't happen overnight. I am so grateful for my temple marriage to my husband. The covenants I made July 16, 2010 are a reminder of what it means to respect my sweet husband.
I certainly don't have all the answers about showing respect to a spouse but I came across a good example in an unlikely place. I've been watching "How I Met Your Mother" on Netflix and there are two characters, Lily and Marshall, who have been together for about 10 years. Lily always says "Baby, you have my full support." I think that telling your spouse "Baby, you have my full support" is a great way to show your faith in and respect for that person. Sometimes life sends couples BIG decisions to make but sometimes those decisions weigh heavier on one person in the relationship. For example, I've been seriously contemplating earning my Master's in Publishing. It's a hard decision to make because it would affect pretty much every single aspect of our life. I am grateful that Tyson listened to my concerns, my research, my excitement, my apprehension, and my self-doubt and then said "Denise, if you want this, I will support you 100 percent." I am so grateful to have a husband who will assuage my fear and just support me.
I am still learning how to be like Tyson in this way. I get wrapped up in the details and the what-ifs when I should just trust and support. Luckily, my sweetheart is patient with me and I always come around.
I'm sure that showing support is not the same as showing respect but I do think it's a huge step in the right direction. Add some love and tenderness to the equation and the answer to my question may not be as elusive as I originally thought it to be.